EW02:Self-Evaluation Prompts

Welcome to Expressive Writing: Session EW02 .

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For easy access to handouts or worksheets referred to in the session, please use the links below.

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While there are times, events or transitions in one’s life that may require the ‘big work’, most of general day to day living don’t need layer after layer of self-evaluation. Many of us simply feel better after writing about something that has been weighing on us or a topic that is fundamental to human nature.

#1: Think of the most wonderful experiences in your life, happiest moments, ecstatic moments, moments of rapture, perhaps from being in love, or from listening to music, or suddenly ‘‘being hit’’ by a book or painting or from some great creative moment. Choose one experience or moment. Imagine yourself in that moment. Write about the experience in as much detail as possible trying to include the feelings, thoughts, and emotions that were present at the time. Please try your best to re-experience the emotions involved. (Burton & King, 2004; p. 155).

#2: Lying awake at night. What keeps you lying awake at night? What is disturbing your tranquility?

#3: Avoidance. What don’t I want to talk about? Why? What don’t I admit to myself? Why?

#4: My life worth living. When will I be satisfied with my life worth living? I will be satisfied when….Why?

#5: My reality. Naikan or “looking inside” is a Japanese method that aims to provide a more realistic picture of reality through genuine self-reflection of seeing oneself with the mind’s eye. Answer these questions:

·      What have I received from (someone)?

·      What have I given to (someone)?

·      What troubles and difficulties have I caused to (someone)?

#6: Write a poem – rhyming not mandatory – that describe one of these three ideas --

Your lowest point. How you see yourself today. The person you want to become.

#7: Write a poem about being mindful of today.

#8: Freedom. Real freedom is the freedom from fear. What are you afraid of? If you were to be free from fear, what would you be doing differently?

#9: Write a gratitude letter. Chose a specific person to address your gratitude letter to. The purpose is not to send the letter, though you can if you want to. Reflect on and write about what it is you are grateful for in this person.

#10. 1st person/3rd person (Part A): Describe your emotions and thoughts about a recent event that you have been thinking or worrying about. Describe things from your normal first-person perspective – the “I” voice. Describe the event and your reaction to it. You may link it to other things in your past or present. First person voice -- When I was seventeen, my father left home. I was stuck in a family war between my sister and mother. They hated each other and tried to pull me into their battles. Even writing about it now brings up pain and sadness I always felt in our house.

#11: 1st person/3rd person prompt (Part B). Now, look back at what you wrote in the first-person voice exercise. Write about the same general issue using a third person voice, as if you were observing everything as an outsider. Remember the DBT Core Mindfulness What Describe Skill. Try to include the same basic information that you included in your initial writing.

Third person voice-- When he was seventeen, his father left home. He was stuck in a family war between his sister and mother. The two hated each other and tried to pull him into their battles.

#12: Visualize what the best version of yourself would look like in an ideal future (Part A). Spend only a few minutes on each question. Try not to pause or think too much while writing. Write down what comes straight to mind.

1.     Think for a moment and choose something about yourself that could use improvement

2.     What habits do you currently have that you would like to improve on or perhaps remove all together?

3.     Thinking long or short term, what is something you would like to learn in the future?

4.     What qualities and characteristics does your ideal self possess?

#13. Visualize what the best version of yourself would look like in an ideal future (Part B). Spend only a few minutes on each question. Try not to pause or think too much while writing. Write down what comes straight to mind.

1.     Strong relationships are key to living a fruitful and meaningful life. In your ideal future, what are the relationships with your parents and siblings like? Do you have plans to create your own family? What do you seek in a partner and what can you give in return?

2.     Having a healthy social network in your personal and professional life is a key ingredient to a fruitful life. Who are the people you would like to surround yourself with and what are they like?

3.     Work gives you a sense of purpose whilst creating security and fulfillment. Short and/or long term, what are your work aspirations? Do you want to leave or excel further within your current work? Do you want to pursue a passion or start your own business?

4.     In your ideal future, how will you spend your free time in a more productive and purposeful way?

#14. Think of the most memorable (good, bad) holiday (4th of July, Thanksgiving, New Years, etc.) experience in your life. Imagine yourself in that moment. Write about the experience in as much detail as possible trying to include the feelings, thoughts, and emotions that were present. Please try your best to re-experience the emotions involved.

#15. What “undesirable” events, people or things in your life can you learn to “desire” and look at or treat with more empathy? If we want your life to go -- well rather than wanting events to conform to your desires, can you make your desires conform to events?